A slightly different entry for today.. But it's still worth putting your thoughts into.."Desire controls perception. You see what you want to see, you hear what you want to hear.."
That's the quote from the Flying Dutchman, which I heard over the radio while in a cab to school this morning.
Ever wondered why we misunderstood our friends at times? Because we expected him to be saying something when he actually intended another.. Same string of words, different interpretation of meanings..
A wife seeing her husband having lunch with another woman.. Overwhelmed with jealousy, she thinks and accuses her husband of going out with another woman..
For all you know, that other woman is the husband's colleague. They were having lunch together with a few other colleagues. It so happens that there were only 2 of them (the husband and the other woman) when the wife saw them.
In a teenager's context, a girl gets jealous when she sees her boyfriend walking with another girl, and starts accusing her boyfriend of two-timing her.
For all you know, that other girl is the boyfriend's classmate and they happened to be leaving class together.. and the girl might not have noticed her boyfriend's other classmates since she doesn't know them..
How do we overcome such a problem? How do we avoid our preception from being controlled by our desire, especially in such a problem?
In Islam, there is a concept of husn al-zan < حسن الظن>(positive thinking).
As humans, we have the tendency to think negatively of others, especially when what we see or hear appears or seems to be negative. When we think negatively <سوء الظن>(soo' al-zan), that's when we start to have doubts of others or throw wild accusations at them.
However, we must know that we do not know the bigger picture. That is why the Prophet sallAllaahu 'alayhi wa sallam taught us to always think positively of others, give them the benefit of doubt.
WAllaahu a'lam.
6 comments:
ok. at last! this is the first entry i read that i can understand by reading once. haha. interesting. more down to earth.
sometimes, u just cannot help it, thinking the other when u should think abt the next. i suppose, when those kind of situation happens, jealousy will just squeeze itself right between, with or without realising it..i mean, we all have got to admit. GUYS and girls' mindset, perception, even desires are total different things..i mean, deception IS bound to happen..btw, easy to speak a situation without experience..haha..u ever happen to be in this situation before?
by: supposedly mysterious girl.
The examples mentioned are meant to be open-ended, open to interpretations.. no correct answer.. =)
u ALWAYS have smth to talk back seh..hahah..kla...i dun want to comment already la..once in a while say la," well said.." ke..." good thoughts.." i mean like..ure response can sometimes be depreciating. haha
*strike out "depreaciating" and subsitute it with," demotivating" it's a better word
interesting post brother. may Allah reward you for this effort. just want to add something. while the third party should have good thoughts/suspicion, as muslims we should also avoid being in compromising, awkward and suspicious situations. i conclude this personal and strictly personal opinion of mine from the hadeeth whereby some companions rushing by when they saw the messenger of Allah speaking to a woman. being concerned for them, he called them and told them that the lady was his wife, may Allah be pleased with her. they replied that they wouldnt dare have evil thoughts regarding him. but he remarked that the shaytan flows in the children of Adam like the flow of blood. yeah, so avoid being in compromising situations. and Allah knows best.
Syukran for your comment, dear brother. BarakAllaahu feek. Perhaps you can introduce yourself. =)
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